Tuesday, May 29, 2007

But it FEELS like Monday, dammit.

Sometimes the carefully calculated and practiced schedule of my bubbleboy routine gets disrupted. Things don't seem quite as they should. I can go through the motions of morning preparation, accomplishing everything on my mental checklist, but finishing each task leaves somewhat of an empty feeling. There's a disturbance in The Force, Obi Wan. Something has tipped my world on its side. Many environmental factors can cause this to happen...

This time it was Memorial Day.

Sure, it feels like Monday. In my twisted mind, the day that follows Sunday is Monday, even when it's actually Tuesday because yesterday was Monday. And it really shouldn't matter a lick anyway since my Tuesday routine is identical to my Monday routine. I should just be able to snap out of bed, write-off yesterday as if it happened like any other typical Monday, and welcome Tuesday with open arms.

But it's not that easy.

I'm going to arrive at work in a short while, flip on my computer and launch my email program. That's when unread messages dated Monday, May 28th will start flying in. Then I'll have that moment, however brief, where I question my decision to not answer those emails before I left the office yesterday. How could I have missed an email that came in at 2:20 p.m.? It's right THERE, you blind fool! And it even has a highest priority flag icon. It could have been an emergency that only I am equipped to handle and I missed it! For a brief moment, I'll be angry with myself for failing my duties. Then I'll remember that it is Tuesday and that I did not work yesterday.

And then I'll get agitated. Who the hell is sending me a "high priority" email on Memorial Day?! Every one of my fellow employees has this day off. Either someone didn't get that holiday reminder memo, or they are doing work and sending emails to co-workers from home. Why?! This isn't exactly the time of year when things absolutely have to be done in one day or else. There are no urgent publishing or project deadlines. Sure, things still need to get done, but this is summer. People take vacations in the summer. And the workload reflects that fact. Everyone busts their collective butts throughout the year so when summer rolls around they can take it down a notch and, dare I say, relax even.

People should not be sending emails marked "high priority" during the summer since there are no short deadlines for anyone to worry about. The only reason someone might find themselves in a "high priority" situation is if they, somehow, dropped the ball and forgot to handle a long-term project in a timely manner. And now, suddenly, THEIR time mismanagement and impending deadline become MY problem because I just received their "high priority" email! I don't even want to open the message now because I'm so pissed! How dare they have the nerve to thrust their disorganization and stress on me! I get my projects done on time, or at least I make every effort to bring all the peices of a project together long before its actual deadline. That's probably what this priority email is all about. They need stuff from me, stuff that I photographed, or created before they can finish whatever it is they've been asked to do. Or I'll bet they need me to create something from scratch. Ugh! I can't stand last-minute requests for original artwork! Don't these people realize that I'm not creative 24/7?! Sometimes it takes time for an idea to materialize into a coherent design. You just can't rush that stuff, folks. I'm not built that way! I don't even want to open this email message!

And where do these people get off with even using that stupid priority flag catorizing feature when sending an email, anyway?!! Who are they to decide what messages I should be treating as priority? I'm fully capable of determining what is important for ME and what is not, thankyouverymuch. I don't need your little red fucking flag to tell me to read your message before any others! I shouldn't even open this thing just out of principle! Not only did this person use the red "high priorty" flag, they typed "URGENT!!!" in all-caps in the subject line! They must think I'm a fucking retard to have---- oh wait.

It's just a spam message for Cialis.

Never mind.

It still feels like Monday, though.

1 comment:

well then, jenji said...

Cialis...LOL...Nice.

By the way Lispy Lisperella ALWAYS red-flags her emails to Coe and then labels them URGENT! Then, she calls one second later to say, "I sent you an email," which is usually some horseshit about "send this to twelve friends or the ghost of Edna will sodomize you."

The woman is whack I tell ya!

jenji